Thoughts From The Valley: A Terrifying Near-Loss, And Ten Things To Think About

The Hangover

HOW I AM FEELING: Odd. Yes, I am happy that My Beloved Penn State Nittany Lions won on Saturday. Yes, I am happy that Evan Royster (187 yards) finally looked like Evan Royster. And yes, I am happy, also, that the Temple Owls pushed the Nits to the limit; as you know, folks, I have been hyping the Owls (and their coach, Awesome Al Golden) for months. So, yeah, My Team Of Choice won, and My Belief In The Owls has been validated. But again, I feel odd. And here’s why: Because Penn State almost lost to Temple. That hurt to write.

WHAT I AM DRINKING: Victory Moonglow Weizenbock. It is the Autumn-time, folks. Officially. Which means it’s time, also, for an Autumn beer. And there ain’t no Autumn beer finer than this one. Viva Victory. Viva Autumn.

WHAT I AM LISTENING TO: Mozart’s Symphony No. 40 in G Minor. You've probably heard it. If you haven't, you're missing out.

VILLA UPDATE: Longtime reader and Friend Of TCFA Nick Cerimele, Esq., does not like soccer. Not one bit. And so he recently posed a question to Your Editor: "If I donate money to TCFA," he asked, "will you stop writing about soccer?" My answer: Yes. Nick has yet to pay up, however, so I will keep writing about soccer (the offer stands, though, folks). Here goes: A good week for the Villains, as they knocked off Blackburn Rovers, 3-1, in a Carling Cup match on Wednesday, then followed that up with a 2-1 win over Wolverhampton on Sunday. Villa is now fifth in the Premier League table. The Champions League trembles in fear.

MY THOUGHTS ON THE WEEKEND: We’re officially a third of the way through the 2010 college football season, folks.

Yep. Believe it or not, the season—you know, the season that, like, just began—is one-third over. And this is depressing, of course.

But I choose not to dwell on that fact today.  Besides, we’ve all got enough to worry about.

Instead, let us embark on a one-third-of-the-way-through-the-season review of sorts—the biggest storylines of the season thus far, ranked from 10 to 1. Shall we? Yes, we shall.

The storylines are as follows …

10. Georgia is 1-3. Yes, Georgia is 1-3.: This is a stunner, folks. But it’s also the sign of A Disturbing Downward Trend for the Dawgs under coach Mark Richt. Get this: Richt won 10 or more games in six of his first seven seasons in Athens. Then, last year, he went 8-5—an ugly 8-5. And this year? Well, this year Richt’s boys are 1-3. They just got embarrassed by … Mississippi State. Yes, Mississippi State. Georgia is headed for a losing season, and Richt is squarely (cliché on the way) on the hot seat.

9. Temple is 3-1. Yes, Temple is 3-1.: This is a legit 3-1, folks. Temple is good. And wiith the toughest tests of their schedule behind them, the Owls might not lose the rest of the season. 11-1 at Temple? It's not impossible.

8. Stanford. Wow.: 52-17. 35-0. 68-24. 37-14. Those are the scores (all wins, of course) of the Cardinal’s first four games. Their opponents? Sacramento State (eh), UCLA (just crushed Texas ... in Austin), Wake Forest (decent) and Notre Dame (much improved). Best team in the Pac-10, hands down. Top 5. National title contender. Jim Harbaugh is a mad, weird genius.

7. Notre Dame still isn’t talented enough.: Yes, Brian Kelly has made an impact; the Irish are playing better, smarter football. Unfortunately, they’re still only 1-3, because they have no talent. They are a second-tier program right now. It's kinda sad.

6. Tennessee still isn’t talented enough.: See above. Swap out Kelly’s name and put Derek Dooley's in there instead. Same deal.

5. Ohio State is the only powerhouse in the Big Ten, and Alabama is the only powerhouse in the SEC.: Don’t give me Iowa or Wisky. Don’t give me Florida or LSU. I ain’t buying.

4. Texas and Florida are hugely, hugely overrated.: These are borderline Top 20 teams. In Texas' case, maybe borderline Top 25. The ‘Horns finally got exposed (more on this below, folks). Florida’s time is coming. Soon.

3. Denard Robinson is the best player in the country.: And it’s not really that close. There is Robinson. There is 'Bama's Mark Ingram (who, by the way, is definitely better than Trent Richardson). There is Boise's Kellen Moore. And then there is everybody else.

2. Penn State almost lost to Temple.: I mean, I predicted a Temple win. And yet this fact—the fact that Penn State almost lost to Temple—still makes me feel angry and embittered. We’re through the looking-glass, people. The end is nigh.

1. God Bless This Game.: I swear to you, folks, each and every Saturday is like a gift from heaven (aka, Happy Valley). The beauty and awesomeness of this game never, ever ceases to amaze me.

THREE YARDS AND A CLOUD OF DUST

THREE: In 1999, a UCLA team led by Cade McNown (remember him? --->) traveled to Austin, Texas. And promptly beat the Longhorns 66-3. UCLA returned to Austin this past weekend for the first time since that infamous beatdown; if anything, the so-called experts were expecting a 66-3 Texas win this time around. But then the game started. And it all went to hell for the ‘Horns. They lost 34-12. In front the largest home crowd in Texas football history (oops). To the same UCLA team that has already been beaten by Kansas State (oops) and was crushed 35-0 by Stanford (oops). Said Texas coach Mack Brown afterward: “I don't feel right now that we're very good at anything.” Truth.

TWO: In this week’s edition of the TCFA Podcast, My Long-Time Buddy And Short-Time Co-Host Mike Unger revealed that Mississippi State’s bulldog mascot is named ... “Bully.” I hadn’t realized this fact, folks, and I must say, upon Mike’s sharing of this news, I immediately became angry. And here’s why: Naming a Bulldog “Bully” is just about as creative as naming a horse “Horsey” or a fish “Fishy.” It just sucks. But you know what sucks even more? This: The original “Bully” was not actually named “Bully.” No, the original “Bully” was named ... “Ptolemy.” Yes, "Ptolemy." AND THOSE NUTJOBS AT MISSISSIPPI STATE ACTUALLY CHANGED HIS NAME TO BULLY! I officially hate Mississippi State, now and forever.

ONE: Boise State is the best team in the country. I really believe that. And here’s why: In a one-game showdown, I like Boise’s chances against anybody. Yes, anybody (that includes you, ‘Bama). The Broncos, quite simply, are winners, which is why I believe that if they get to (i.e., if they are permitted to play in) The Mythical National Championship Game, they will win it. Just one problem: I’m not sure they are going get to (i.e., be permitted to play in) The Mythical National Championship Game. And there are two reasons. Reason 1: People in the South and people in Ohio hate Boise with A Weird And Frightening Intensity. Reason 2: Nevada just might be able to pull off the upset when they play Boise (at home) in late November. In case you hadn’t heard, folks, the Wolfpack just cracked the Associated Press Top 25 for the first time since 1941. They also just beat BYU, in Provo, 27-13 (exactly one week after crushing Cal, 52-31). So, yeah, circle your calendars for Friday, Nov. 26. Boise State-Nevada might prove to be the biggest game of the season.

TOUCHDOWN: So how much did Texas’ loss to UCLA hurt them? This much: The Longhorns fell all the way to No. 21 in the Associated Press Top 25 this week. Yes, No. 21. Just one spot in front of No. 22 Penn State. Who almost lost to Temple.

For more searing college football insight, please check out my work over at About.com, where you can read my weekly Power Rankings, ponder the About.com Heisman Trophy Watch, get darn-near daily blog updates and more.