Thoughts from the Valley

The Hangover

How I am feeling: Pretty good. Pretty damn good, folks. I'm a little sad that the Big Ten regular season is over, of course, but I can't complain about how things ended for My Beloved Penn State Nittany Lions on Saturday. That 42-14 win over Michigan State up at Spartan Stadium was fun to watch Lots of fun to watch. Daryll Clark went out in style. And that's just what he deserved. 

What I am drinking: Sierra Nevada Celebration Ale. You know the holiday season has arrived when this beer makes its first appearance at the beer store, folks. Picked up my first case of the year on Thursday. Damn good beer. It's a got a Christmas-themed label and everything. Worth a try, folks. Worth a try.

What I am listening to: The Band, "It Makes No Difference." The live version, from The Last Waltz, the greatest music film ever made. You could make the argument that no band was ever better at their peak than, well, The Band at its peak. They were like the '94 Nittany Lions, folks. Talent all over the place.

My thoughts on the weekend: As longtime readers know, I have longstanding and deep-seated issues with ESPN Meathead And Resident SEC Shill Todd McShay. Actually, it might be more accurate to say that I have one longstanding and deep-seated issue with ESPN Meathead And Resident SEC Shill Todd McShay.

That issue is this: He is utterly incapable of saying anything negative about anyone in the SEC, and just as incapable of saying anything positive about anyone in the Big Ten.

You probably think I'm exaggerating, folks.

Well, I'm not.

Even though the guy didn't actually play in the SEC (he played at Richmond, which is just fine with me; I assure you, I have no issues with the good folks at Richmond), he's still in love with the SEC, which is America's Most Ridiculously Overrated Conference. He's one of these guys who actually belives people run faster in the South than they do in the North. It is, on its face, one of the most ridiculous myths in the history of sport, not to mentionally scientifically impossible, but nevermind that. McShay believes it to be true.

McShay also believes that if you're a quarterback who plays in the Big Ten, then you suck. Simple as that. If McShay had seen Freaking Tom Brady playing for Michigan, he would have said something to the effect of, "Good player. But he's no Heath Shuler." Heck, maybe he did say that. I can't remember. I try to block out McShay as much as possible.

That being said, McShay is rather ubiquitous, and is therefore difficult to avoid.

Which is how it came to be that, on Saturday morning, I found myself confronted with McShay's appearance on SportsCenter, during which he predicted that Michigan State would beat Penn State (no big deal; I predicted the same). But that's not all McShay said. Nope. McShay also offered up his reasoning for why he believed Michigan State would beat Penn State.

That reasoning? "Daryll Clark is an interception machine in big games."

That's what the man said, folks.

His statement was utterly ridiculous and mostly off the mark, of course, and though that's what we've all come to expect from McShay, the words still stung The Nittany Nation. They especially stung the actual Nittany Lion squad, which was watching the McShay debacle in the locker room at Spartan Stadium on Saturday morning. Oh, and among those who witnessed McShay's Latest Dumb Statement?

Daryll Clark himself.

"I'm like, 'Did he really say that? Wow, that was a low blow,'" Clark explained last evening. "I was really upset about it, but I couldn't let it bother me. I still had to play a football game."

A game to play, indeed.

And what did Clark aka The Alleged Interception Machine do during that game?

Well, this: 319 passing yards, four passing touchdowns.

No interceptions.

Oh, and there's this: Clark leaves Penn State with the school records for single-season touchdown passes (23), career touchdowns passes (42) and single-season yardage (2,787).

His record as a starter? 21-4.

Three Yards and a Cloud of Dust

Three ...: About halfway through the second quarter of the Ohio State-Michigan game, I called up my Dad with an obversation. "I don't think Ohio State is that much more talented than Michigan," I told My Mentor. "I just think they're coached better. A lot better." My Dad agreed. Michigan has players, folks. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. I've been defending The Snake-Oil Salesman Wearing A Wizard's Hat here recently, but you know what? He didn't do a very good job on Saturday. His team had chances. They just kept blowing those chances. That goes straight to coaching.

Two ...: Wow, what a mess down in Athens. Two days after the untimely death of Uga VII, the 'Dawgs went out and absolutely crapped the bed (pardon my language, but that's what they did, folks) against ... Kentucky. The loss makes Georgia 6-5 on the year. They need to upset Georgia Tech next week to have any chance of playing in a mildly non-embarassing bowl game. Wrote Jeff Schultz in Sunday's edition of the Atlanta Journal-Constitution: "They got bruised in Stillwater, blindsided in Knoxville and humbled in Jacksonville. Also, their dog died. Nobody intended for Georgia’s season to unfold like a country-western song. It just sort of turned out that way."

One ...: The big talk in Big Ten country for the next two weeks, of course, is going to center on Iowa and Penn State--and which of those two teams is going to earn that much-coveted BCS bowl bid. Well, from what I'm hearing, this is the deal, folks: The Fiesta Bowl wants Iowa. The Orange Bowl wants Penn State. Only one can get their wish. So who wins out? Well, it's too early to tell, and a lot can happen in the next two weeks, but if I was a betting man, I'd put my money on the Nits. Remember, folks, it's not about which team deserves it more. It's about which team will turn on more televisions--and fill more seats. Draw your own conclusions.

Touchdown ...: A programming note, folks. Thanksgiving is coming up, and as per our tradition here at TCFA, that means that Your Editor plans to slack off a bit this week. Yes, there will be a Friday TCFA. It just won't be as long/involved/detailed as usual. Just wanted to let you know, folks. Have a good Thanksgiving, and I'll see you on Friday.